what do you do when you want to say something, but don’t know how to say it….or wonder if saying it is too much?? Doing too much??
Should you “have several seats (btw, I hate that I use this phrase….fucking conditioning) ???
how do you say something when nothing else needs to be said???
How do you say:
my arms are fragile…my skin is silky and requires lotion after showers….I would love to have my body drenched in cocoa butter, melting my complexion with the color of anticipation….and I’m thinking it should be with you…I’m thinking, it should be you on the rubbing end of the butter blend with my skin and yes I would be lying if I said I had not thought, at least three times, about interacting with your lips with French lessons…. * physical shrug *
so about this ‘us’
wouldn’t you like to be of apart of something amazing ?? daring to be different, or at peace or fuck it, in a mistake that felt so right at first…..do you not find this interesting ??? Do you not see this body, do you not see these hips longing for the thick kind of hands that have the perfect line contours that will allow them to feel me in ways no other person ever had or could
because they are not you
isn’t this interesting ??? That we might hit it off…whatever that means….that we might enjoy the company of each other…
I’m serious, are you laughing ?? Because to be able to carry all of this, all of this which has so often become a stressor or a lesson learned …, to be able to bear the ups and downs of being and bearing the candy your eyes are suckling on,
simply MUST be accompanied by an internal relevance that is unique in its own function…..this is serious,
wouldn’t you like to learn my functions? My clockwork ?? What makes me tick and what sets off alarms?? Wouldn’t you like to hit the snooze with me? ? Is prevention a good decision in our case?? Isn’t it worth the wait and the prolonged, longed nights that we lay under skies not doing what we want to?? You don’t want to anticipate with me??? Isn’t it worth it the anticipation..?? The desire?? The friendship development??? Look, no one is trying to Hub you ….
I’m not “LOOKING” for anything…definitely not serving my left hand up on a platter but if I’m all about living, shouldn’t I be trying to do it ?? Should I really just remain quiet when that hasn’t got me far in all this time?? I mean, look at you….I think you are worth it…I’ve studied your smile with careful peeking at least 26 times…and yeah, I’ll be bold for you….I’ll go there for you, I’ll dare to be vocal…dare to be loud….dare to let you know my eye didn’t have an eyelash in it, baby, that was wink…
I’ll say it to you…does it sound good yet?? Isn’t this interesting….
to see how my mind work?? I’m interested in yours??? What if we ended up being really great people who know each other?? Or lovers creeping out of bed sheets to jump and high kick in the hallway because the motion is good but the fact that the boat is intact makes the cruise the kind you never want to leave….Is this language foreign??
You don’t want to receive this gravitating orbit around the getting to know each other process ??? You think I can’t make you laugh??? Smile even ??
You think I’m better suited for someone else and you the same….….
another’s earned touch, a different type of peace
somewhere else….you think my plus one is somewhere else???
Maybe he is….
but let there be no mistake….this was not a bold act of defying my inner thoughts….this was no regret, this be not a remorseful situation
I am not the desperate …
I am just the grown….going for the gold even if I can’t have it…somebody better tell me no or I won’t quit….I won’t let up until what I want to be mine, IS. ….
unless someone tells me no,
unless you tell me no,
unless we find each other looking into sterile eyes that hold tears and bullshit….lies and fool’s gold….unless we say no….,
then this entire conversation will go down as a proud moment for me…..and you will always have been worth the shot !
Q:What do you say when you want to say something but nothing needs to be said???
A: Say nothing.
…..music writing session….Iris (GooGoo Dolls), How to Save a Life & You Found Me (The Fray) & Chasing Cars (Snow Patrol).