Fuck It, Feel It Day

the energy in the air tastes like fungus


green

sticky

mucous.....

sound nasty?

feels nasty too.....



the aroma coats my throat with algae, this -

is for the birds

not

for the poets

this is for the war

not

for the poets, THIS

is for the hattfields

not for the

POETS



i refuse to go battleship with this shit

if maya didnt have to do it

why the hell should i

if Giovanni's words were able to reach

touch

smell the sky,

why can't mine

it doesnt have to be this way.....i dont have to have this bile ass taste being swallowed

i dont have to feel swallowed into the belly of the beast when i come in peace

all this iraq blood shed on my hometown sheets of paper

we crip walk across pages,

declaring war on terror

yet

terrorizing ourselves

and

each other

smothering venues with ego love hate baseball games



catchers mits catching shit instead of words

bacteria instead of knowledge

snares in place of memorized stares

he can't respect my words

cause he dont like me

he cant feel my poem

cause i REFUSE to ride on his team

this aint for me

i'm a poet

and this

aint for the poets



this is more for the rappers

let them peel the caps and hoe each other out across 48 gold-dipped bars

but this war



it aint for the poets

this beef

aint for the streets

contrary to some belief, this is NOT a fight and a streetwar on weed

THIS

is a movement

words are water and can easily fall into line with your ears,

sink into your skin pores and value you

appreciate you

THIS is liquid in letter form

this is a cactus morphed into a rose that grew from the brick wall



thats what this is

in my heart

so keep your fungai

your fuzz of mold

keep your lost cause, keep your broken eyebrows that point down when i touch the stage with my poems

keep your raw beef

cook it....consuming undercooked foods can kill you.







freewrite #100...idk...im just guessing.....i was driven to write this from a invite i have....keep it to yourself ken....keep it to yourself...lol...this is how i keep my feelings to myself....some ppl need to be checked for real yaw...if you are reading this....all this poetry BEEF...HAHAHAHA....i got real beef with ppl....real pain, real "you did me dirty" and its not cool, but if i have been able to overcome the shit i have over came in the past year alone where poetry is concerned, then all this lolligagging and wanna be westside-whoobanging-poetry-beef that is going on needs to cease....cause it does absolutely NOTHING to help the community...i'm not calling for unity....i'm keeping it real....there are some people in the community right now, that i will NEVER speak to, that i honestly wouldnt piss on to relieve their desert thirst...i mean that....but thats my own ish right there...but there is a common ground that we can all be on....and i often see at least one person that i would love to just push over the edge of the cliff, but i dont sit and scowl at him all night or go tell all the ppl that talk to him, why they shouldnt trust him....i dont have to acknowledge him...i would never partner with im for shit!!! But....
there is a common ground we share, and thats poetry and its stupid to sit around and waste my time talking about what went wrong LAST YEAR .....when i need to be focused on dropping my cd, writing my books, cleaning my house, walking my dogs, changing the world, i mean damn ya'll....

has it seriously come to this.....i'll say it...i'll take this hit for the team....we got two open mics on the same night, same time.....i dont know what thats about, and im not trying to speculate, but i'm going to say this....
stuff like that opens the door for beef, if it doesnt already exist....THAT would not be helping an already sticky situation...that would be the audience suffering......and i usually stand in the middle ...i understand both sides of the equation 90% of the time....here lately....i've just been going thru the wringer with poetry.....trying to become one with it again....i havent lost my love for it....but....i'll say it like this: I have spoken with ALOT of ppl, random ppl that feel this cloth of negativity over the poetry scene when they are out....and this isnt me prompting a conversation, this is just what it is and we can keep pretending and ignoring it and doing other stuff to perpetuate it and turn the other check, but
ITS THE AUDIENCE SUFFERING....they dont want to see or hear that shit...in all honesty

its in the air thick....that would be the audience suffering ..



there is a lot of stuff that could be avoided, because in the end, the poets who are silently and subconsciously beefing with each dont suffer.....THE AUDIENCE DOES! so why dont we make this our personal pep talk....everybody: talk about me if you want, talk about the things i've said, the conduct i've had....but make sure you run tell him what brought it on.....or just, as jill scott would say, stay silent!!
try to tarnish me to my ppl if you want....they will always be my ppl, cause they know me.....i've been dogged out....i've been run right over and completely disrespected...but i've always been honest.but i still respect POETRY....still love it.... TELL YOURSELVES that!!! now if you dont fit that bill, dont tell yourself that...dont even worry about...perhaps you should try rap....

and keep it moving to doing something more positive instead of trying to blow egos up with stage side bombs.....



btw

i really feel like naming a few names, but i would never do that cause i'm not petty like that...i'm just fucking it and feeling it, whatever it is, however it is coming to day.....i'm very disappointed in some poets....very.....and its not even about being personal...its about respecting the arts the way i thought we all respected it....please lets dont let poetry turn into hip hop vs rap....